Milestones: Part 1

The more Jenna grows, the funnier she gets. She has moved out of the stage of sitting and absorbing in everything around her to interacting and developing very unique little characteristics.


I'm sure as every mother has realized at some point that babies know A LOT more then we give them credit for. Infants can learn how to manipulate into getting what they want and sometimes we don't even realize it. I remember the first time Jenna was "crying" or more like yelling at me when I knew she had just had a new diaper, been fed, and had plenty of cuddle time. She wasn't tired or sick either. She was just mad that I had turned around to wash a few bottles. I looked back at her and she almost seemed like she was laughing because she had just gotten my attention which exactly what she was aiming for. 


Sometimes when I watch her play, I will see her doing really creative things! The first time she figured out how to put her binky in her mouth was really amazing. To some people it seems like no big deal but when you have an infant who came into this world hardly capable of doing anything, every milestone seems like the biggest thing in the world!! Jenna figuring out how to put her binky in her mouth was mostly pure luck that it had not been upside down or backwards. But as she realized that she could do this she was trying more and more times. Sometimes it would be upside down or backwards and she would get frustrated. The first few times I helped her out and then she finally figured out her own way. She would try to put it in her mouth and then when it didn't work, she would drop it and try again hoping it would be a different angle. I found this really creative that she thought to do that. She is now a pro at getting her own binky and I sometimes wonder if this is a sign that she no longer really needs it for a "comfort"....

The other day Jenna wanted more toys then I had put out for her and has finally figured out where they are hidden. She crawled over to the basket and tipped it over and out fell all of the toys. Now she seems to do it almost every time she is playing. I wonder if this is a bad habit but how do you tell a 7 & 1/2 month old that they can't do that when she doesn't even know her own name yet! 

Babies and Sleep

For some reason, while I was pregnant I always heard that babies will start sleeping threw the night at around 6 months....HA!


Maybe it was just me thinking that or from others personal experience that I have heard,that this image was set in my head. But as Jenna gets older I wonder when she will EVER sleep threw the night. As she goes to bed at 7 p.m. every day then wakes up at midnight, 3 a.m., and 6 a.m. for a feeding. This has been her pattern for well over a few months. Although she has had on rare occasions slept from midnight till 8, I don't ever count on it that it will be her new routine.


But then I think, with all this complaining I do about wanting her to sleep threw the night, I wonder would I even start sleeping threw the night? Actually, I KNOW I wouldn't sleep threw the night. When Jenna does rarely sleep threw the night I am still up checking on her, seeing if she's breathing. I agreed with Aidan that I would do all the night time feedings because of his work schedule.


As much as I sometimes wish to get a full night of sleep, I really do enjoy night time feedings. They are for the most part, the most bonding feedings we have. During the day she is to squirmy and distracted to cuddle. She would much rather explore and move on her own now that she has learned to crawl. 


Eventually, babies do grow up and they become toddlers and sleep threw the night, but do they really? Whether  it's a nightmare, need to go potty, thirsty, or just scared they are still waking up. Seems like the only time they truly sleep threw the night is when they become teenagers and are sleeping till noon. But then by the time they are this age we are telling them to get up earlier! So what do we really want? 

Am I Ready?

How do you know when your ready? Ready to start your career, ready to get married, ready to raise a family?

These past few months have been some of the most stressful months I've ever had. I'm young, and have not had to deal with much more then worrying about myself my whole life. On top of finishing school, I've been busy raising a baby, when I'm not even an adult myself. In the past week I have finished my last class of high school and will be starting at a community college at the end of this month. But school is not the only thing I am worried about. As Jenna is quickly approaching her 1st birthday, I wonder what kind of mother I want to be. I've always been one to read about things and all threw out my pregnancy read about the changes the both of us were making. Then I started reading into the first year, how frequently she needs to be fed, how much each feeding, sleep, play, development skills, etc.

As Jenna gets older I realize, I have no idea how I want to parent. I read all about different parenting techniques and it scares me the uncertainty of parenting a toddler. There are a few things I know I want to do or not do as a parent from my own parents, but how do you know which way is the "right" way? And is there even a right way? 


The uncertainty of the future has given me anxiety like I've never experienced before. I know everything will be ok, but I have become obsessed with doing things perfectly. I want to be the best mother to Jenna that I can be because she deserves it. I don't know if I will ever feel "ready" but wish I had some peace of mind to cut back on some of my stress.